Monthly Archives: September 2015

Why Baby’s First Day At School Went Like This…

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It’s Baby’s first day at school, I am sure when Baby got back home yesterday and you tried to ask how the day went but got an incoherent answer or a one word “fine”, reply. All that waiting and wondering what your child is doing at school or constantly resisting the urge to pick the phone and call the teacher to ask about your child’s welfare; only to be replied with a very distracted “fine” or a I-have-no-idea what-you-mean look, all wasted.

Relax, the gist will come.

It’s the first day and you smirk at the sight of grown men and women up way earlier than usual, out of their rooms, some still in their pyjamas and night gowns; to watch baby get dressed in the new school uniform ensemble. The buttoned and pleated gown or buttoned shirt and shorts, the sock with the school’s logo on it, the black shoes; and the cute but sturdy school bag (which could pass off as a Nigerian’s hand luggage because you know they could need a little more extra items).

Your smirk becomes a chuckle when everyone hurdles out the house still in their pyjamas to wait for the school bus to arrive or watch the family driver repark the car, so that his/her royal highness doesn’t have to walk too far to sit in the car.

Then, the phones come out and cameras start to click and click and click. At this point your smirk becomes a grin because you are wondering why Baby is being subjected to the pyjamas-wearing paparazzi because he/she is wearing a tiny uniform.

Your grin however becomes a full-toothed laugh when everyone starts waving at the receeding image of the car or bus as it whisks the child away off to school (away from you and your camera) simultaneously offering torrents of ‘school advice’, most of it mundane and outrageous.

“Don’t cry in school”, {Baby is baby. Babies cryDon’t talk to boys (in the case of girls)”, {yeah, right}

“Stay in school” {Again, Baby is a baby.}

“Read your books”{Great advice}

…and my personal favourite “Don’t beg for food” {Yeah, baby shouldn’t  be doing that but um…}

Little wonder why the kid’s response after school is a meagre “fine” when you ask how Baby’s school day went. Because Baby aint gat no time for your numerous questions.

My first day at school was just me being dropped off by the driver, screaming my head off and screaming even more when my brother took me to my class and left. No cameras, no pictures, no uploads. Nothing. Life is fair.

This narrative is a pool of my different experiences with baby’s first day in school, I saw pictures online yesterday. Be kind to share your stories in the comment section.

Anosi

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